Everything is killing me on the inside. I fell for someone who fell for someone else. I sit here and think over and over to myself its not the same. Hes different. This is different. I'm different. But is it really? What is really going to come of this? It sounds like a bunch of high school bull shit drama. You can't give your heart to someone when someone else has it, and boy do I know that. Even today I still find it hard to fully give my heart to someone. Hes the only guy who I have been able to even almost give my heart too. I needed more information first...and I got that information. Thank god I backed off. I know he said not to back off emotionally but I'm not going to get hurt again. He is not going to destroy me. Period.
Some may ask, why I'm still with him? Well, I love him. There really isn't any other explanation for it. I trust him with everything but my heart. He makes me happy but he can also kill me. Hes the sweetest poison I've ever tasted, and its slowly killing me.
